EEEP!

Please note that the entry below was written yesterday, but we were unable to post it then. We had some temporarily terrifying ftp in/out issues yesterday between our ISP and Blogger that seem to have cleared themselves up for now.

The whole episode shook us to our very core, and made us realize how much we have come to love and depend on our little soapbox here, and how it has been a high point for us in a very high and happy year, and we suddenly thought we ought to thank you, dear readers, from the very bottom of our tiny tin hearts, for what has been the finest gift of all; your attention. We intend to reward it in the coming year with more more more and bigger and better mangos.

Thank you. Merry Christmas. Happy New Year.

* * *

SOLSTICE

Today is what it’s all about for us here at Mango Pudding Blues. It’s the shortest day. Oh, sure, this year we decided to embrace Christmas – yes; even to become Christmas itself! – rather than continue on our dreary former campaign against it. But our yuletide embrace is a crafty one, gentle reader. We are like the pagans who continued to celebrate their wily feasts under the guise of their conqueror’s holidays. We have lit up our pine tree in our living room, yes. But we know in our heart of hearts that we are not celebrating Christ. We are raging against the dying of the light. We are trying to banish the encroaching gloom. We are huddling in our cave and waiting for the sun to tip from Yin to Yang on the fulcrum of this day. Our mortal little soul is awaiting its annual surge of relief when it feels, tomorrow, the almost imperceptible lengthening of the day that signifies the promise of the cycle of life.

Ho ho ho.

* * *

A PRESENT FOR ME

I never wear neckties these days. The high-tech culture abhors a necktie, let me tell you. But when I was in Boston this summer, I stumbled across this real beaut in the Harvard fucking giftshop. Nuts, I know, but I buy it anyway, for full American dollar price, and have them giftwrap it for me, and when I get home I hide it in a basket and forget about it. The other day I stumble on it and set it under the tree, and now I’m peeing myself, waiting for Christmas Eve to see what I got in there.

* * *

POTENTIAL NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS

Another year? Shit, dawg; bring it on! At Mango Pudding Blues, we’re almost ready. We’re feeling ecstatic. We’re feeling elastic. We’re burning with fervour. We’ve got the zeal of converts. We just gotta sort out the resolutions. Here are a few of the possibilities we’re considering:

Decrease respect for authority

Drink more French wine

Resume French lessons

Begin baby music lessons

Strengthen deep abdominal muscles as recommend by our physiotherapist

Harness the awesome power of incremental behavioral changes

Get sleek pocket camera to rekindle love of photography

Wear only high-end socks. No more cheap socks

Use more yellowy green

Do one big thing

Wear more black

Double protein intake

Produce one satisfactory painting

Learn more about building stuff on the internet

Send more stuff in the post, especially to Mom

Arrange to receive more stuff in the post

Redesign blog

* * *

IT’S THE BRITNEY INFLUENCE

Goodness! One is suddenly seeing rather more of Kylie Minogue than one ever expected to. We at Mango Pudding Blues have vague recollections of her first run up the pop charts, and we’re pretty sure she didn’t have quite so much skin back then. That was a long time ago. One hopes her grandchildren aren’t watching the music video channels.

Ever on the prowl to increase our readership, we are considering duplicating her feat of twisting a simple white bedsheet into a highly revealing wispy hooded gown and traipsing around in front of you here. Stay tuned.

* * *